Thursday, 23 July 2015

35 Thoughts Everyone Has In a Yoga Class

  1. Look at all the people in their nice yoga outfits! Whilst I'm just here rocking out my ten year old tracksuit.

  2. Though let's be reasonable, this tracksuit has stayed in ridiculously good quality over the years...

  3. I wish I could justify owning that many different yoga outfits. Or, you know, even just one.

  4. This space at the back is quite ideal. I would not like to see my failures at bending from four
    different angles, thanks.

  5. Help, my trousers are attacking my butt :(

  6. I feel like everyone can just see everything right about now.

  7. Clearly you and I have a very different understanding of the word, "Beginners."

  8. Yep, I am definitely the least bendy person in this entire room.

  9. I wonder if I've ever even been able to touch my toes?

  10. I don't even understand how your legs are bending in that way.

  11. Oh, wait, everyone else is doing that too. Just me, then.

  12. I really appreciate the fact that in yoga, it's acceptable to basically lie back on your butt when you want to hide the shame of the fact that you can't hold a plank any longer.

  13. Seriously, arms, why can't you hold yourself up?!

  14. This man is making really obnoxious noises every time he breathes out. He really, really needs to stop.

  15. It's actually beginning to make me quite uncomfortable. I don't know what you're thinking about, but I think you should probably try not to anymore.

  16. How is everyone else standing perfectly still whilst my leg is flying around like it's a trampoline?

  17. If I fall, should I try to keep my arms in position, or just let them protect my face?!

  18. Everyone definitely heard that.

  19. I wonder if she realises that her yoga pants are basically see through.
  20. Yoga Girl
  21. I don't even understand how you got yourself into that position.

  22. I'd like to try it, but I also like not having a black eye.

  23. Chakra what?!

  24. This lady is expecting me to remember where far too many chakras are. I can't visualise these things when I have no idea where they're supposed to be or what even they are!

  25. This teacher is actually WAY too into yoga. Like there's enjoying and believing in what you do, and then there's this...

  26. Laughing yoga. Just no.

  27. It's either think about the breathing, or actually doing the poses, what do you want from me?!

  28. My mind is silent, my mind is silent...

  29. Nope, just thinking about dinner again.


  31. Everyone else is in their happy place and I'm just trying to remember if I have any ice cream left in the freezer. Should I buy some more just in case? I really want ice cream. Those new Magnums are so good...

  32. Is this the part where I achieve enlightenment?

  33. A yoga retreat, that sounds like fun! I could go to Thailand, eat delicious food, and then completely embarass myself at my yoga failures but IN A DIFFERENT COUNTRY. Result.

  34. Seriously, I kind of want to do one though.

  35. I feel relaxed, and stretched, and free...!

  36. Nope, been on the underground for five minutes. Life is back to normal. Need to go and do more yoga already. Grumble grumble.


1 comment

  1. Ahaha - too funny! I've thought at least half of those, especially my own personal version of the last one ;)

    I'm co-hosting the #HomeMattersParty link party this month and would love to have you visit. The current party is open until Monday night.


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